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Sweet, supportive, loving, incredible Brave Girls….you know that all around you and all around the world Brave Girls just like you are struggling. They don’t show it, but inside they feel it. What if you knew? What if you could see into their hearts? What if she was your sister or your daughter or your mom. Today our question is…
What would you tell a Brave Girl who needs to forgive herself or someone else?
Remember…she is real. What would you tell her if you had a quiet minute together? Leave a comment and tell her…she’ll find it.
xoxo
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Exactly what the photo above says… Let Stuff Go! Just let it go! Don’t base the rest of your life over a mistake.
Forgiveness only comes when you have overcome the hurt and the anger. You can’t forgive someone just because they tell you to because it will make them feel better. It is all about making yourself feel better and when you are truly ready to move on with life and not harbor the bitterness, you will then be able to forgive.
Forgiveness is for you. Not for the person you are forgiving.
It’s not about saying it was ok.
It’s about saying that YOU are not going to let it hold YOU back.
And y’all are right… it’s about letting it go because we each only have so much energy to spend.
Much better to spend your energy in creating Goodness as opposed to holding on to unforgiveness.
Love y’all! Thanks for helping ME to be BRAVE.
All the feelings you feel are YOURS the other person is not spending ANY energy or emotion on it or you; YOU are the ONLY person that has to LIVE with what’s INSIDE of yourself….YOU WILL BE STRONGER to put it in your hand, like a feather, and just blow it AWAY!! You think it’s this HEAVY thing….but it is as light as a feather when released!
I would remind her that ‘forgiveness’ and ‘justice’ do not go hand in hand, though most people confuse the two.
You may never see ‘justice’ in this lifetime for whatever someone did or didn’t do to you or for you, but regardless, forgiveness is as necessary as breathing.
Is it as easy as breathing? No way, not by a long shot.
However, resentment is even a harder thing to hold on to, for holding on to anger is “like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned.” — Siddhartha Buddha
Forgiveness is HARD, but entirely worth it.
I would like to say that what Liz say’s about forgiveness and justice not going hand in hand is very true. Justice doesn’t make things better. If anything for you to wish justice or even do something to get back only lowers you and maybe even puts you in the same category as the person who hurt you.
Forgiveness is necessary. Not for the other person but for yourself. You can then concentrate on the positive energy in your life and not be brought down by the negative,. It isn’t easy and it is something you learn with age but it can be done. You may not realize it but when you get past the hurt and forgiveness you will have learned something……
Remember that your and other’s perfect imperfections are part of a growth process and EVERYONE is doing the best they can in that moment. There is learning in every upset for us. Only you can decide whether you want to carry gasoline or water the fire of the situation.
I would tell her that forgiveness is so freeing!! You no longer let that person, or that event have a hold of your thoughts. Forgiveness is just as much for you as it is for the person you are forgiving. Even if they are not accepting of your forgiveness, you know you have done the right thing. You have stopped carrying that baggage that is weighing you down. So forgive anyway, let it go, FREE Yourself!!!
What I could tell you about forgiveness, It’s a gift to yourself. It is so much easier than you may believe….. Thatyoucan do it!!! It is so worth it!! It’s nota try thing it’s a just do it thing?? Go soar you can!!
I would tell her to Let Stuff Go, and sometimes you have to let people go as well. So many times we hold on to people and continuously forgive when they hurt us. I chose, over 3 years ago, to “let go” of a sibling and found that it freed me from a bitterly vicious cycle of being hurt and then having to forgive, almost being expected to forgive. I actually had to forgive myself for allowing this person to repeatedly hurt my feelings and my heart.
However you choose to free yourself from the weight of not forgiving, stand firm.
I would say that forgiveness is one thing and moving on is something else. It is not so hard to forgive someone about an incident in the past, one that is over. The hurting can ease and it is easier to forgive. The trouble is that sometimes the hurting goes on and on because that person still has a toe stuck in the door of your life. Someone many years ago told me that there are only three things we can do about something that bothers us. 1. Accept what you can accept, 2. Change what can be changed, and 3. if you can’t do one of those things, put yourself away from the hurt. That is hard to do because that means it includes people that we care about. But if it means your own well being and is a means to stop the hurt, you may have to put yourself away from someone that you care about. Some relationships are plain toxic.
Forgiving frees our soul to soar. Holding on to hurt, anger, and resentment strangles us, smothers us, and snuffs out our light.
It took me YEARS to realize this…. I wasted time. I wasted energy. I wasted opportunities.
Forgive now, right this second! Gain time, energy, opportunities to grow and spread your wings. You, too, can take flight and soar. IT’S YOUR CHOICE!
I’d add to the wonderful comments above that forgiveness isn’t the same as forgetting that something happened, or even that it was ok that it happened. It is about acknowledging that something unpleasant happened but you aren’t going to let it define your life in a negative way. And a little bit of recognizing that all human beings make mistakes or even act badly on purpose.