Let me start by telling you each how much I truly care about you, how much I love you….I must start this way because I’m gonna practice a little bit of “tough love”…the same kinda love that was practiced on me when I was choosing hopelessness and when some loving, strong someones took my hand and begged me to choose a better way…
I was reminded of this message again this week when a dear new kindred soul friend sent me this beautiful piece of art that she made. Her name is Wendy Brightbill. She and I have walked similar paths….you can read in this blog post she wrote recently……I was on one side, and she on the other, but our despair was so much the same……..she is now starting a HOPE REVOLUTION…….please go to her blog to find out more and make sure you tell her beautiful soul that I sent you…..
anyway…on to the TOUGH LOVE……dished out to me but a few people who loved me enough to have tough conversations with me…..
…because no matter how much someone loved me, they could not choose hope for me. No matter how much we look for easier ways…hope can not be decided by anyone but ourselves. HOPE can not be delegated if you are too busy to do it. Hope can not be bought or ordered on the internet. Hope is work…hope is a choice.
…and, hope is our own job…probably one of our most important jobs, ever. So many things will just fall together when we hope…but hope is OUR OWN job.
I will remind us all what the alternative to HOPE is…..
hopeless (ˈhəʊplɪs) — adj
1.having or offering no hope
2. impossible to analyze or solve
unable to learn, function, etc
3. informal without skill or ability
would you REALLY want to choose hopelessness?
Now, let’s look at what hope really is…..and see that it really and truly is an active choice…one that must be made over and over again throughout the day, concerning just about everything…or else negativity, cynicism, settling and hopelessness can settle in…and who wants that???
If you are in a place where it seems like it would be easier to choose hopelessness, and you think that something is wrong with you because you have lost hope, please just know, dear friend….that nothing is wrong with you…..but maybe you just didn’t understand that you must do the job of CHOOSING HOPE. Hope will try to choose you……but when all is said and done, YOU must choose to hope.
Hope is the beautiful little seed that must be planted to grow anything and everything that we could ever yearn for in this life. Everything starts in our hearts and minds as an idea…..and the next big step is HOPE….hope that it is possible…hope that it could actually happen….hope that things will come together….hope that you will know the way or learn the way…….next…we take action that is fueled by that hope. If we d not have hope, we really can’t get started in a way that will ever be able to keep going.
I want you to know that I have had days when, without really knowing….I chose hopelessness. I have felt hopelessness. I have felt like life was impossible….especially the life that I yearned for. I have felt unable to learn, function….and without skill or ability…..now I know that I CHOSE to let myself feel those feelings because I was not choosing hope.
Once I started to choose hope, everything changed. I went through and found pieces of my journal and art that I started to make as I was working so hard each day to choose hope….these are the kinds of messages that we must remind ourselves of. We must come home to the truths of who we are…come home to ourselves. We must take an active role in our own rescue…….the way that we do this is to CHOOSE HOPE.
I am reminded of this very important lesson again as life has recently taken an enormous & beautiful and miraculous twist that I never could have expected and brought me to a place where new, very big life work will begin….and I do not feel qualified, I do not feel completely up to the challenge, I do not feel smart enough or strong enough most days……but I feel called to it……..and so I will have hope in it. That is my most important job right now…to have hope in it.
I am wishing for you in this moment that you will take every bit of bravery and courage and energy that you have left…and that you will use it to even spark a tiny little glimmer of hope. Believe in something……there is so much goodness and beauty and truth JUST WAITING for us to hold hands with it. Hope wants to walk with us….skipping….dancing on the trail of our lives…but we must take it’s hand.
Sending you all so much love, and wishing you the courage to choose hope. PLEASE JUST TRY….I beg you. It will be worth it.